Last week, a couple from the town of Harper, Kan., attempted to stick themselves in the middle of the ongoing debate regarding the legality of same-sex marriage.

Attorney Phillip Unruh, along with his wife, Sandra, filed a legal motion to be included as defendants in an ACLU lawsuit that seeks to allow same-sex marriages in Kansas.

The couple claims that the legalization of same-sex marriages in Kansas would devalue their personal property. Said property being their own marriage. The filing states that same-sex marriages would cause “profound harm” and be “deeply disturbing” to the couple.

Wait, what?

Despite the recent (non)decision from the U.S. Supreme Court regarding same-sex marriage, and the rapidly growing amount of states that have moved to allow them, some people, like the Unruhs, are still clutching at straws in an attempt to enforce their own notions of morality.

Many an argument has been made, but this one might very well take the cake.

Essentially, the Harper, Kan., couple feels so strongly that what others in this big, beautiful world are doing will directly impact their lives to the extent that they need to put a price tag on their own relationship.

This begs the question – how much are marriages going for these days? And is depreciation a factor? Interestingly enough, Unruh declined to reveal the monetary value of his own marriage in his filing, but one can only assume that it wouldn’t go for much on Ebay.