My Life as a Washburn Student

This is the story of my life here at Washburn University. This is a story of highs and lows. A story of depression and happiness. Of failure and success. This is my story and it’s a good one. My name is Resistance Garvey (assigned pseudonym) I am from Derby Kansas. Derby is a suburb of Wichita and it is only two hours away from Topeka. My family and I are extremely close. Leaving them and going to college was one of the hardest decisions that I have had to make. I thought that only being two hours away would be plenty of space for me to grow and become my own person, while still having the ability to come back and visit when I could. However not having a car was a major hitch in my plan. I was really struggling with being home sick. My family here got me through it. I made so many friends here at Washburn, and we have become very close throughout the year. My friends mean a lot to me and they were helping me to make this a marvelous year. My life was starting to be in the place that I wanted it to be. My friends and I had decided to go to a house party. While I was there I meet a boy. We had spoken a few times before but not for very long. My friends and I went into the basement with this guy and a few other guys so that we could dance. Everyone started to move upstairs but held me back in what I thought was a playful manner. I was alone in a basement that now haunts my night mares with a boy who hurt me in a way that I thought no one ever could. I went back upstairs and pretended that nothing had happened. I went home that night feeling fine. When I woke up the next day I couldn’t take it. I spent two days locked in my room not talking to anyone and crying more tears then my body should have been able to produce. I finally called my sister and told her what had happened. I told her that I wasn’t raped but that he tried to do so. My sister reminded me that I was strong and that I got away for a reason. Despite my begging and pleading she told my parents and they came to Topeka and took me to the police station. I told the officer what had happened. She told me that we were looking at a sexually battery charge. She then asked me if I had told him no and when I told her I didn’t her whole tone changed. As if not saying that one word changed what he had done to me. It was as if fighting him and pushing him off of me and crying wasn’t enough. It was as if that one word would have changed the outcome of what happened to me that night. After that it took me a long time to get back to a good place. Seeing him on campus made me relive that moment over and over and over again. But with the help of my friends I got thought it. We went to another house party about 8 months later. He was there. I panicked, but this time I wasn’t alone. My friends where there to keep me calm and told the owners of the house what had happened to me. I was nervous at first. I didn’t want people to know because I didn’t want them to look at me as a victim. I wanted them to look at me as the girl who was strong enough to get away. And they did. No one changed the way that they looked at me, no one judged me. They removed him from the house, and we had a great time. Later that night the owner of the house told us that one of his friends had overheard the guy talking to his friend outside and admitting to what he did. It made me feel a lot better to know that the word no didn’t change anything. That even though I didn’t verbally say the word no he still knew that what he did was wrong. I’m still recovering and I don’t know maybe it will always be a part of who I am, but having my friends support and knowing that he admitted that he was in the wrong make it a whole lot easier to deal with. My first year at Washburn was hard but it made me a stronger person and for that I am grateful.