IN THE STANDS: Top 10 changes that need to happen in sports

Mike Ditch Jr.

Top 10 Things I’d Like to See Happen in Sports Before I Die:

10) Bob Knight coaching Allen Iverson. Which happens first, Knight’s head exploding, or Iverson missing a practice?

9) NBA All-Star Weekend has P-I-G, Tip/21, and 3-on-3 instead of the NBA/WNBA game, three point contest, and dunk contest. You’re telling me you wouldn’t watch Kobe try to validate his P-I-G victory over Arenas? Hibachi!

8) Any venue that hosts a professional sports team must have either zero corporate sponsors in its name, or at least seven. You want to watch the Royals at Kauffman Stadium, or see the Chiefs’ exhibition game at Sprint Nextel Gillette Gatorade Fossil Microsoft Apple Magnavox Arrowhead Stadium?

7) ESPN Ocho. I love “Dodgeball” and ESPN already has six stations. Yes We Can!

6) All NHL games must be played outdoors. You get whacked with sticks, you can fight, you could theoretically gash someone’s jugular with your skate, and yet you play on a rink of ice in a climate controlled arena?

5) The dissolving of the MLS and WNBA. Seriously, it’s been fun for the last 10 years, but only six people outside of the leagues would notice they were gone.

4) College basketball expanding the tournament to 128 teams. There are over 300 teams eligible for the Dance, and who couldn’t use more college tourney action?

3) The use of technology to replace tennis linespeople, baseball umpires, and football/basketball/hockey referees.

2) A three year moratorium on all fouls in soccer. You want to fall down like you’ve been shot by Cheney, then perhaps you should see what real pain feels like.

1) A college football playoff system. 8 teams, eight bowls, three weeks, EVERYBODY is happy.